I owned a pair of rose tinted glasses. They were more of a soft tan tint than a rose. But, I have to tell you, it didn’t make one heck of a difference in my vision. Everything looked the exact same. Enough that I went a solid 5 minutes walking around in public with one of the lens popped out and never knew the difference. Yeah, that was me.
So, maybe rose colored glasses is a bad title. But, if you understand the point of the phrase, you will understand where I am headed.
Scott and I are in the middle of taking some required Adoption education classes. And, as much as I hate to admit it, I am really struggling.
Not with adoption. Not with adopting from Ethiopia. But, with the pre-conceived notions that I had regarding adoption.
I am learning more and more and more that an infant/child/teenager who is adopted…no matter how loving their home..their new parents…their surroundings and support…
There is still a sense of loss. A separation. And there will be grieving. And maybe even for a lifetime.
And there is nothing that I can do to change that.
Of course, I will want to fix their sadness. I will want to answers their questions of “why”. I will want to fill that void.
But, I can’t. And it really isn’t my job to do that. At least, from what I am understanding.
Today, I feel like I am in over my head. Scott and I didn’t go into adoption blindly. But, I guess today my heart is just really sad for what my child will go through before they come into our home…and the fact that I can do nothing to change where they came from makes me feel a little helpless.